We all struggle to achieve what we want in life. That’s a given.
So why is it that some of us can work through these the struggles with minimal effort…
and for others, they get completely stuck?!
I believe that it’s because of the stories we tell ourselves.
That’s right – we are all giving ourselves bad advice every day. And we are also giving bad advice to those around us.
Do these sound familiar?
1. Snap out of it
Sounds great on paper, but if you’re struggling with depression, or hopelessness, it’s not that simple. Stop acting like it’s as simple as just flipping a switch when you feel like you have no power in your life. In these cases, you can’t just snap out of it. What you need is the ability to recognize your limiting beliefs, and learn to reprogram them to something more empowering.To learn how to reprogram and reboot your brain to something more empowering. That way, the next time you think to yourself “Snap out of it”, you can say “Reboot my brain” instead and actually take steps forward!
2. Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be
This is one of the lamest phrases on the planet, in my opinion, because it’s an excuse to give up and blame “the great unknown” for your struggles. It teaches you to (1) give up, (2) blame the “universe”, (3) give away your power, and (4) avoid responsibility for getting what you want. If something is important to you and you are struggling, then what you need to do is step back, let go of the problem, ask yourself “what do I need to do to accomplish this goal?” and “who can help me get there?”. Stop looking for a reason to avoid what you want, and start looking for ways to make it happen.
3. Just do it
I gotta admit…. sometimes, “just doing it” can be the right strategy. But there is ‘grit’ and then there is “dumb grit”. If you’re procrastinating, or struggling, then “just do it” may not help. You may get something done, but it is not what you really wanted. You may find that you just end up trying harder, without learning to try smarter. Abraham Lincoln said “give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.” To me, this means, “plan to execute, then execute your plan.” Plan it out first. Identify all the struggles (internal and external) you expect to arise, adjust your plan to account for those struggles…and then – Go Do it!
4. Push through.. No pain, no gain
This one makes me crazy! You CAN overcome every struggle you’re having right now. I believe that with all my heart and soul. But it doesn’t have to be painful. There are ways to overcome without pushing through pain. You’ve been taught to “damn the torpedoes, full steam ahead!” All you get with that approach is to be struck by the torpedo! It’s possible you may achieve your goals, but at what cost to your soul? Emotional pain and suffering are caused when your conscious mind tries to override your subconscious mind. It’s a sign that your action and your beliefs are out of alignment. In those cases, emotional pain and suffering are a sign to stop and figure out where you are out of alignment. Pushing through, only damages your heart and soul. This goes hand-in-hand with Just Do it… figure out where you are out of alignment first, then Go Do it!
5. Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps
I used to subscribe to this theory. In life, in politics, and in my business. But somewhere along the line, I realized to open my mind, listen to every smart person I can find, and only then take action. In first world societies, we look down at those less fortunate. We assume they aren’t taking responsibility. And we pass laws to prohibit people and governments from lending a helping hand. And we do this in spite of the overwhelming research that says ‘it takes a village” to eliminate poverty.. hunger.. disease… and make all of us collectively successful.Trust me – I wouldn’t be where I am today if I hadn’t learned how to keep an open mind, learn from others, and accept help where offered.
If you are trying to reboot your brain for success and abundance, or find the love of your life, or create the ideal life, getting help is the smartest thing you can do for yourself. Find a friend or coach who has been through your struggles and engage them to help you.
It’s said that “those that don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it”. So find someone who has overcome, and stick to them like glue! You’ll go a lot further … a lot faster!